This felt like more than just a ‘busy season’ but an accumulation of years of placing my worth in my doing. 

The two biggest prayer points I had when I left South Africa was that God would bring me into a good church and provide Godly friends.

What followed was years of complications, injections, laser procedures and surgery to slow down the condition.

This was obviously a terrifying prospect for him and for us, and things seemed to go from bad to worse...

I felt like if I were to continuously pray for healing then I was not in a place where I could say ‘it is well with my soul’.

We found out our mortgage would be increasing by a jaw dropping £700.

I was living in a homeless flat and we were praying for a house.

No tests revealed any ailment and we were soon faced with the reality that this pain might be a permanent fixture in her life.

She was having severe migraines every morning, often disrupting her sleep and studies during the day.

The uncertainty made it worse; I’d get anxious about getting anxious — a vicious cycle.

I brought this request to the church and together we were praying and praying that I would be able to connect with him again. 

In May 2023, I knew God was calling me to Scotland but had no idea what the moving timeline would look like.

My faith was ignited, and I started writing, trusting God for the outcome. 

We still talked about it, and hoped about it, but we started praying more for short-term plans

I never prayed a more desperate prayer than the 3am plea for my baby to go back to sleep

I waltzed in alone thinking nothing of it, only to be told that I was in early labour. I was 23 weeks pregnant.

Whilst my heart was definitely in it, my autistic brain was already booked on the next ferry back to the mainland.

How come I always forget what God has done for me?

I tend to have imposter syndrome and knew that as a redeemed believer I should go to Heaven but would I?

So sometimes my on-call rotation falls on a Sunday, which means I have to take my laptop to church just in case